First: A huge huge huge congratulations to my friend Maura McHugh, who won the World Fantasy Award last weekend for her short story “Raptor” in the anthology Heartwood (which also garnered a World Fantasy Award for its editor, Dan Coxon).
Loved every word of this, Lynda. You're right––the only thing that can really lift us up and over all the negative stuff in a writing life is surrendering to that deep, hopeful and open-hearted love that you describe so beautifully. Having a spiritual relationship with our writing isn't an oddity. It's a requisite. Thanks as always for the great and encouraging words.
Hey, great read as always. You totally nail it about there being no maigc trick. It reminds me so much of my Pilates practise – consistent effort and just showing up is what truly builds strength, not some quick hack. Love your point about just needing to read and write alot.
Thank you! And yes, it's so true about Pilates--I run, and do yoga, and I struggle with consistent effort in everything I do (because there's a little voice in me that always fights against routine and consistency). But I think a lot about how similar they all are and how they're all about turning up as often as possible and just doing the thing over and over no matter how you feel that day. Even or especially if you have an inner nonconformist/rebel without a cause voice who's lighting a cigarette and screaming something like "You can't tell me what to do, man!"
The "writing is bullshit except when it isn't" is so spot on. It's the "when it isn't" that keeps us going, though, isn't it? I've recently decided to pull out and work on the very first "book" I ever wrote. I can remember telling people that it "just fell out of me" and I can remember how much fun it was to write. Looking at it now, I can see that it's not perfect, but I can also see, maybe, how to fix it, and that feels like something. Enough to keep me going. That's the high I'm always chasing, though the older I get the more I realize that feeling is kind of rare.
That's brilliant! It really is a high, isn't it? I'm closing in on finally completing a second novel (I wrote one, unpublished, and started a few others) and it feels great. I hope you can see how to fix it--time and distance can be the most helpful thing in the world for that sort of thing.
Excellent piece and huge congratulations to Maura McHugh. I’m writing a fair bit at the moment and have a pile of stories more or less finished but I’m so frustrated with the whole business that they’re going nowhere. After 30 years of being published I still feel like I’m in the ‘slush pile’ (horrible term) and I still haven’t been paid for the story I had published last year. But thanks for this piece - I sometimes forget that writers with a far higher profile/way more success than I’ll ever have also have their frustrations!
I think wherever we are it feels like we've done nothing, because I did a double take at "higher profile/way more success" and looked around like there might be someone behind me you were describing there. Even Stephen King at the height of his commercial success, I remember, seemed very much to want to me seen as more than "just" a horror writer, to get more recognition in the broader literary world, although that did eventually come and I think he's settled down comfortably these days into being a grand old man of letters. But oh my goodness, I could drone on for hours about all the things that haven't happened the way I wanted them to and all the frustrations, hahaha. I think every writer has a sulky, bruised, resentful side, and some days it's harder than others to not let that side take the wheel. Oh, and I hear you on the not paid--keep being the squeaky wheel, on behalf of other unpaid writers if not yourself. I remember one point about 10 years ago when I was going through a particularly frustrating period of having to chase money where I totted up all the late payments that were owed to me and it amounted to almost $2000!
I'm sorry about your frustration with the business--I've been there, always have one foot there, and totally get it. If you want any suggestions for places to send them, though, shoot me an email--I might have some suggestions. Andy Cox has a new magazine, Remains, and it's as beautiful as TTA and Black Static were, and he's always open to subs--https://remains.uk/pages/submissions
I could suggest some others as well though. On the other hand, if you're just fed up with submitting at the moment, I get that too.
I've been writing a little about this myself recently, in an essay on creative writing and tarot, and remembered Betsy Lerner's line that people only keep writing because they either want people to love them or they can't help it. I think we stick with it despite the slings and arrows because we can't help it.
You are still here, and still writing as far as I am concerned. And that door is never closed... you may want to walk through it again, someday, in one or five or twenty years. I treasure the stories of yours that I own and the ones I've read and loved. Nobody should have to tough anything out to make beautiful things, but, well--as Walt Whitman said, "O Life!" You'll always be a writer to me in my secret heart of hearts but I won't call you one until you want me to!
6 loud yeses. Let me say it louder. YES. As a big admirer of your writing, Lynda, always come here hungry and leave satisfied. Now I have to go do some more reading...
Loved every word of this, Lynda. You're right––the only thing that can really lift us up and over all the negative stuff in a writing life is surrendering to that deep, hopeful and open-hearted love that you describe so beautifully. Having a spiritual relationship with our writing isn't an oddity. It's a requisite. Thanks as always for the great and encouraging words.
Thank you, David! I love this: "Having a spiritual relationship with our writing isn't an oddity. It's a requisite."
Hey, great read as always. You totally nail it about there being no maigc trick. It reminds me so much of my Pilates practise – consistent effort and just showing up is what truly builds strength, not some quick hack. Love your point about just needing to read and write alot.
Thank you! And yes, it's so true about Pilates--I run, and do yoga, and I struggle with consistent effort in everything I do (because there's a little voice in me that always fights against routine and consistency). But I think a lot about how similar they all are and how they're all about turning up as often as possible and just doing the thing over and over no matter how you feel that day. Even or especially if you have an inner nonconformist/rebel without a cause voice who's lighting a cigarette and screaming something like "You can't tell me what to do, man!"
The "writing is bullshit except when it isn't" is so spot on. It's the "when it isn't" that keeps us going, though, isn't it? I've recently decided to pull out and work on the very first "book" I ever wrote. I can remember telling people that it "just fell out of me" and I can remember how much fun it was to write. Looking at it now, I can see that it's not perfect, but I can also see, maybe, how to fix it, and that feels like something. Enough to keep me going. That's the high I'm always chasing, though the older I get the more I realize that feeling is kind of rare.
That's brilliant! It really is a high, isn't it? I'm closing in on finally completing a second novel (I wrote one, unpublished, and started a few others) and it feels great. I hope you can see how to fix it--time and distance can be the most helpful thing in the world for that sort of thing.
Thanks for the shout-out!
You're very welcome, Maura!
The overused "+100" may not be enough here. Well said, Linda.
Thanks so much, Matt--I love your work in this area, so this means a lot.
Excellent piece and huge congratulations to Maura McHugh. I’m writing a fair bit at the moment and have a pile of stories more or less finished but I’m so frustrated with the whole business that they’re going nowhere. After 30 years of being published I still feel like I’m in the ‘slush pile’ (horrible term) and I still haven’t been paid for the story I had published last year. But thanks for this piece - I sometimes forget that writers with a far higher profile/way more success than I’ll ever have also have their frustrations!
I think wherever we are it feels like we've done nothing, because I did a double take at "higher profile/way more success" and looked around like there might be someone behind me you were describing there. Even Stephen King at the height of his commercial success, I remember, seemed very much to want to me seen as more than "just" a horror writer, to get more recognition in the broader literary world, although that did eventually come and I think he's settled down comfortably these days into being a grand old man of letters. But oh my goodness, I could drone on for hours about all the things that haven't happened the way I wanted them to and all the frustrations, hahaha. I think every writer has a sulky, bruised, resentful side, and some days it's harder than others to not let that side take the wheel. Oh, and I hear you on the not paid--keep being the squeaky wheel, on behalf of other unpaid writers if not yourself. I remember one point about 10 years ago when I was going through a particularly frustrating period of having to chase money where I totted up all the late payments that were owed to me and it amounted to almost $2000!
I'm sorry about your frustration with the business--I've been there, always have one foot there, and totally get it. If you want any suggestions for places to send them, though, shoot me an email--I might have some suggestions. Andy Cox has a new magazine, Remains, and it's as beautiful as TTA and Black Static were, and he's always open to subs--https://remains.uk/pages/submissions
I could suggest some others as well though. On the other hand, if you're just fed up with submitting at the moment, I get that too.
Bang on!
I've been writing a little about this myself recently, in an essay on creative writing and tarot, and remembered Betsy Lerner's line that people only keep writing because they either want people to love them or they can't help it. I think we stick with it despite the slings and arrows because we can't help it.
Yes - it’s a collaboration with Eyglo. The Eyelash Tarot Experiment: Meditations on Writing, Randomness and Hanging On. Slated to appear next year.
Wow, that sounds terrific. I'll be eager to read it when it's out!
Yes, I think so as well. Are you writing the essay for any venue in particular? That sounds interesting!
Love your work!
Thank you, Christi! I'm a fan of yours too (as you know).
MY ONLY NON-FICTION NOVEL SHALL BE the orchids of the HIMAL. I APPRECIATE ALL ADVICE GIVEN , Laa CORAZON 🖖🏼☮️
You're right about all this and it makes me a bit sad that I didn't manage to tough it out.
You are still here, and still writing as far as I am concerned. And that door is never closed... you may want to walk through it again, someday, in one or five or twenty years. I treasure the stories of yours that I own and the ones I've read and loved. Nobody should have to tough anything out to make beautiful things, but, well--as Walt Whitman said, "O Life!" You'll always be a writer to me in my secret heart of hearts but I won't call you one until you want me to!
❤️
6 loud yeses. Let me say it louder. YES. As a big admirer of your writing, Lynda, always come here hungry and leave satisfied. Now I have to go do some more reading...
Thank you so much! This really makes me happy, it's exactly how I want to make people feel!